Making Memories in all the Little Things

Even though dad can no longer lift a guitar he is still making wonderful music. This for him is the equivalent to me and gardening, life without it is just rubbish. The idea of not being able to do what I get enjoyment out of, find satisfaction and create something to be proud of is a hard pill to swallow. I am super proud of my dads ability to persevere, creating music for all to enjoy ☺️ Below is a link to his latest song... https://soundcloud.com/ornwalluso/forwards-and-upwards

Thoroughly enjoyed my week full of work friends and family. I am very much enjoying my new found relaxed manner to how I do things and what I say yes to instead of no. I know this may seem alien to others but I am a conformist to the 'norm' when it comes to parenting. I think it stems from the taboo that surrounded (and still does) young mothers when I had Brandon at 19. Out of wedlock! The horror ;) I was very much judged, sometimes to my face! by the 'older generation'. This meant I was determined to be a 'good mum' for example I always made sure Brandon was in bed by 7 even when his friends were still out playing. I would never have even dreamt of having him out of the house past 7 either even if I needed to go to the shops for something vital. Anyhoo, I now realise that life is too short to care what others think of my parenting. As long as my children are fed, warm, safe and have enough sleep who cares what our routine is. Tuesday was my favourite day...

Been a few days since I last posted, but have been busy enjoying my family! Good problem to have :) Last Thursday I went to the hospital to have the blood taken for the genetic test. It all became a little too real for me when the councillor gave me the date of results (9th November) and asked me how I would like to be given the news. I didn't have an answer. How would anyone like to be told life changing news? That night I realised why some people get the test done but change their mind when faced with that moment just before the news is given. Will I be brave enough to find out?  At the moment it is like Schrodinger's Cat... I both have MND and don't at the moment which is so much easier to cope with right now, but I also feel like I'm 'holding my breath' when it comes to my future. Saying that, even if the result is positive, I will still not know when I will develop symptoms. What a cruel disease. Went to mum and dads for dinner Saturday and had ...

After a mad day running around at work, picking up my daughter and shopping I was hoping to keep the kids going till 7 so I could get them into bed and enjoy an evening to do what I wanted... never does seem to work that way! As I'm doing dinner I find my daughter crashed out mid play... thats my evening gone I thought, negativity and selfishness creeping in. I don't deny any parents needing alone time and that it is wrong, but I am trying to keep a more positive attitude to the way I think. I enjoyed spending time with Dan whilst waiting for Molly to stir. When she did wake I went up and proceeded to spend the next hour in bliss holding my again sleeping child. To be able to hold my child is such a seemingly small thing that I have previously not thought about, but watching my father unable to use his arms to hug me, I have learnt to cherish these moments. So take a moment next time you hug someone to linger a little longer, to wait a moment longer, to appreciate such ...

Always good to start at the beginning... My dad was diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease back in 2014, aged 64. I knew the implications immediately as my paternal grandmother mother died in her 40s of MND. I never got to meet her. For those of you that don't know, MND or ALS as it is also known is a disease caused by a 'spelling mistake' in a gene that over your lifetime slowly breaks down the sheath around your motor nerves. These nerves take messages from your brain to your muscles, making you move. This gets to a point where it interferes with these messages more and more so until you are no longer able to move and breathe. Time passed and we began the grieving process in the knowledge that this is a terminal Disease. In march dad received a letter regarding his 'type' of MND, this letter suggested that any children he had should be tested. We weren't worried as the chances were low of it being hereditary, or so we thought... On March 2nd 2017 I trundled alon...